RANTS FROM AN AFRICAN CHILD: MISS WORLD 2011; WHERE MISS NIGERIA?

So I’ve been thinking of making my blog more interesting and keeping it updated for a while but ideas were just all over the place. I was watching MISS WORLD 2011 that took place at the Earls Court two in London on the 6^th of November and throughout the show I was angry, disappointed and just plain perplexed! Yes, I know some people will say I just like to carry wahala on my head; well, they are right but that’s me. So I thought; I must blog about this, abi? Isn’t that what a blog is for? (Wide grin like a JJC)

Before the pageant commenced, I googled ‘MISS WORLD 2011’ because I wanted to find out the exact time it would begin Live telecast and I went to Wikipedia; Lo and Behold! I saw how each country fared in the FAST TRACK competitions held, which were; Beach Beauty, Top Model, Sports, Talents and Beauty with a Purpose. In each of these competitions, there were Top 20, Top 30 and even Top 36! I kept scrolling through to see the Green-white-green flag; at least we could have been 36^th of the top 36 or 30^th of the Top 30 for Beauty with a Purpose but NO! Nigeria’s flag and our auntie; the queen were nowhere close! To say I was amazed was an understatement!

I know some people by now will say out of 113 girls, it’s not so easy but at least be in one! Une! Eyokan! I don’t understand why our queen will go for a pageant and we’ll be struggling to see her on stage! Like my mother says “the other girls get 5 head?”  Looking back at the Miss World Pageant since 2001 when Agbani Darego brought home the crown; I have noticed that Nigeria has not been consistent at all. Most of the years between 2003 and 2011; we have been virtually invisible at the pageant. Except for 2004, 2006 and 2008; our queens have just enjoyed a trip abroad and taken loads of pictures.Words that came to my ears (from a bird) indicated that in 2010, our queen didn’t even climb the stage! My question is “auntie beauty queen, bia! What did you go for?”

The truth of the matter is; I do not blame the girls; I blame the Organization that claims to crown our queens. Foremost, I’ll look at the fact that one pageant alone; MOST BEAUTIFUL GIRL IN NIGERIA organized by Silverbird Group crowns Miss World Nigeria, Miss Universe Nigeria, Miss Tourism Nigeria and Miss Ecowas Nigeria! One pageant! Now, if the girls chosen were doing well at the international pageants, of course we wouldn’t complain BUT no be so! Let’s say that cannot be changed; my question is to the Oga himself “Uncle Ben Bruce; Okoedo sir, what do you do for these girls after they win?”

Most of these queens from other countries are put through rigorous training. They are coached in speech, walk, talent and more! As for me oh, all I see is; our queen will have photo shoots and their pictures will be put on websites after enough airbrushing. I never hear of any projects or anything! Did Silverbird help our queen to improve her talent? Did she even make effort with the Beauty with a Purpose competition? Ghana has won it twice in six (6) years. Where we dey? Don’t we have enough people and issues that need help and addressing? Didn’t the queen have a pet project that was monitored? Or does she even have sef? Can’t our queen dance one of the traditional dances out of the hundreds we have in Nigeria for her talent? What did Miss Ghana 2007 dance at the Talent competition to give her a win? Wasn’t it a dance created by a local musician called Terry Bon Chaka (R.I.P)? You can’t go and sing celine Dion when Miss America dey there and win oh! Stick to what you know and know well!

Congrats and thanks to Adaeze Igwe (now Yobo) (Miss Sports; 1^st runner-up and  Miss World Talent Top 19; 2008), Abiola Bashorun, (Beauty Beauty Top 25; 2006), Anita Uwagbale (Queen of Africa, Top 15, 2004), Chinenye Ochuba (Queen of Africa 2002 and Miss World; Top 10) for raising our flag high. And to MBGN Organisers; Silverbird Group; “if e don tire una, abeg, pass the torch, better people dey wey won help us oh! Uncle Ben, release ya hand, let money reach another person!” We need change oh! Enough is Enough!

As for future queens, we need better! We’re tired of telling people “oh Nigeria, we’re good oh! We won it in 2001, we have just relaxed” mba! Let us watch Miss World with more than just the memory of Agbani Darego, let’s watch it with more faith that the next girl that walks unto that stage with NIGERIA on her sash can actually bring home the crown!

E don do! Make I go sleep! After all, I no fit contest sef! I’m a smallie and proud! Biko, I rest my case!

GLOSSARY

·         Where Miss Nigeria                        - where is Miss Nigeria

·         Wahala                                                - Trouble, problem

·         Abi                                                         -  right

·          Eyokan                                                - one(1) in Yoruba language

·         “the other girls get 5 head”         - do the other girls have five(5) heads?

·         Bia                                                         -  come in Igbo language

·         Oga                                                       -  Boss / Master

·         Okoedo                                               -  greeting in Ijaw Language

·         “Where we dey?”                           -  Where are we?

·         Sef                                                         -  at all

·         Dey there                                           -  Is there

·         “if e don tire una, abeg, pass the torch, better people dey wey won help us oh! Uncle Ben, release ya hand, let money reach another person!”

-          “if you’re tired, please, pass on the torch, there are better people who want to help us! Uncle Ben don’t be tight fisted (selfish), let someone else benefit)!

• ·         Mba!                                                     -  no!
• ·         JJC (Johnny just come)                          - novice

·                  E don do! Make I go sleep! After all, I no fit contest sef! I’m a smallie and proud! Biko

-          It’s enough, let me go to bed! After all, I cannot contest, I’m petite and proud! Please!

ELOHO!